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<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql rrkovp55 a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>I don’t want to say that my wife’s large, but when she got hit by a truck I asked the driver, “Why didn’t go around her?” He said, “I didn’t have enough fucing petrol…” </span>
There are better things in the world than alcohol but I don’t have them so alcohol will have to do
Lawyer: I have some good news and some bad news.Client: Well, give me the bad news first.Lawyer: The bad news is that the DNA tests showed that it was your blood they found all over the crime sceneClient: Oh no! I’m ruined! What’s the good news?Lawyer: The good news is your cholesterol is down to 130
It’s nearly that time of year when we get a visit from that fat character with a beard bringing presents for the kids.I hate my mother Inlaw!!.
<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql rrkovp55 a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>I got sacked from PC world yesterday…A woman came in the store and asked me what was the best thing for finding your ancestors…I said a shovel…</span>
<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql rrkovp55 a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>During all of the isolation time, I decided to take up a few musical instruments. I figure if I’m proficient enough, I can use my talents to make a few extra bucks. So far I’ve learned banjo, accordion and bag pipes. The offers have already started to pour in. You would be surprised how much people are willing to pay me not to play.</span>
I went to see the doctor with a persistent neck problem. It’s agony every time I tilt my neck upwards I explained It’s really affecting my lifestyle and quality of life.”
In what way? He asked.
I’m struggling to finish my fucing Beer!
You can bypass the throttle body, though best to keep the rad line intact.
Mother in law just fell down a wishing well…I’m in shock….I didn’t think those things actually worked….!
The England vs Barbarians rugby match was cancelled because some of the Barbarians went for a meal against covid regulations.Because sticking your head between arses in the scrum, is much safer than ordering the meal for four, isn’t it?.
2 cops and their police dog are standing outside a pub when a drunk walks out grabs the dog by the tail lifts the tail up has a look puts it back down shakes his head and walks away2nd drunk walks out grabs the dog by the tail lifts it up has a look puts it back down shakes his head and walks away3rd drunk walks out grabs the dog by the tail lifts it up has a look puts it down shakes his head and starts to walk away when the cops grab him and say what are you doing to our dogThe drunk replies the bartender inside said there is a dog outside with 2 arseholes and i wanted to see for myself!
