CommodoresPlus

The wife just called me.

She said, “Three of the girls in the office have just received some flowers for Valentines Day, they are absolutely gorgeous.”

I said, “That’s probably why they’ve received flowers then!!..

The fella next door took going to jail really badly,He refused all offers of food and drink,spat and swore at everybody,and even smeared the walls with his own shit.

Thats the last time i ever ask him over for a game of Monopoly,,,

Paddy and Brigitte, a middle-aged couple, had drifted apart and the end of their marriage came one Friday night over a plate of fish and chips.

“It’s no good Brigitte, this marriage is a sham, I’m leaving you. I may be 57 years old but I’ve met a 19 year old who wants to be with me and I want to be with her”, said Paddy proudly.…[Read more]

Over Breakfast One Morning
Mary and her husband were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy morning.

He suddenly said, ‘Mary, if I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff.’

‘Now why would you want me to do something like that?’ Mary asked.

‘I figure that you would eventually remarry, and I don’t want some other…[Read more]

Two guys were picked up by the cops for selling drugs and appeared in court before the judge. The judge said:

You seem like nice young men, and I’d like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and persuade them to give up drugs forever. I’ll see you back in…[Read more]

Reckon you got them in the nick of time! In a running vehicle could have catastrophic!

A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said, “I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS.”

The agent replied, “I’m sorry, sir. I’ll be happy to try to help…[Read more]

The year 2020 in review so far:

Harry & Meghan leave the royal family.

Prince Andrew abolished from royal duties for being a nonce and it’s swept under the carpet.

World war three nearly breaks out after Donald a Trump orders airstrike killing Iranian chief.

Corona Virus threatens to wipe out half the worlds population.

Philip Scholefield…[Read more]