CommodoresPlus

I went to one of those positive thinking classes last night. . .
It was crap

<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql lr9zc1uh a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>Arsenal have decided not to participate in the European Super League. They are starting their own breakaway league with just themselves. The bookies…[Read more]

I have liver disease caused by years of heavy drinking. My wife said I should go to BUPA, but I did the complete opposite….
I went to APUB !

Was a cool car!

I was writing my Autobiography into the wee small hours and fell asleep face down on the page. When I woke up the ink had fused the pages onto my skin and I couldn’t get them off.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql lr9zc1uh a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>An alcoholic wakes up in jail. He asks the first police officer he sees “why am I here?” The officer replies “for drinking” The man replies “great, when…[Read more]

William Shakespeare went to get vaccinated.

Nurse: Which arm?

Shakespeare: “As you like it.”

Nurse: Was that painful?

Shakespeare: “Much ado about nothing.”

Nurse: You will have to have a second jab.

Shakespeare: “Measure for measure?”

Nurse: So, how was the experience?

Shakespeare: “A midsummer night’s dream!”

Nurse: So…[Read more]

Jamaica enters the Vaccine race with their
RASTA ZENICA
It’s not as affective as the others, but after the second dose you don’t care a fuck anymore!!

BBQ RULES:
Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for…[Read more]

Looks great!

Some guy in the pub said, “I went to see my doctor today. He diagonised me with a disease which will ruin my sexlife forever.”

“What?” I asked. ” gonorrhoea? chlamydia? Aids?”

“No,” he replied. “I’ve got arthritis in both hands.”

<span class=”d2edcug0 hpfvmrgz qv66sw1b c1et5uql lr9zc1uh a8c37x1j keod5gw0 nxhoafnm aigsh9s9 d3f4x2em fe6kdd0r mau55g9w c8b282yb iv3no6db jq4qci2q a3bd9o3v knj5qynh oo9gr5id hzawbc8m” dir=”auto”>Paddy asked his girlfriend for a clue as to wot he was getting for his birthday . She winked at him and said it starts with F and ends in UCK . “Oh my…[Read more]